Systems Transformation begins Within
Early in visiting communities, I learned about Non-violent Communication, or NVC. This is training to re-learn how we express our feelings and emotions in daily life. But it is so much more. NVC is, in fact, a platform to explore the fundamental question, “What makes us happy in this world?” Marshall Rosenberg, the founder of NVC, says there is a deep human need that underlies every single action of humankind: we want to belong. He goes so far as to say it is our purpose in life to belong. And what is belonging? Rosenberg defines belonging as a two-pronged, reciprocal act. Belonging is both the act of giving our gifts and talents to the world, but also having those received lovingly by others. Communities, thus, create a stage for this dance of giving and receiving. Once I learned this, I couldn’t unsee Marshall’s core principle of belonging.
I arrived in Larz, Germany to a defunct Russian airbase late on a rainy Friday night to attend the 2022 Fusion Festival, the Burning Man of Europe. Over 300 acres of musical stages and theatrical performances, enchanted forests with disco balls, and neon-clad pop-up bars. Pirate themed stages and Blade Runner districts. Fire spinners and light whippers. Gypsies and anarchists and crypto-millionaires all co-creating an atmosphere of intense peacefulness and fantasy supported by 24-7, ‘anything goes’ atmospherics.
But I wasn’t there for the big-name DJs or the buzz of a seventy-thousand person event. I was there to learn about the community. And after three restless days of dancing, circus acts, and world-class art exhibitions, I found what I was looking for. Of the seventy thousand attendees, ten thousand were supporting the operations - whether that meant cleaning bathrooms, staffing cafes, or working as production crew. And did they show-up for the free ticket? No, these ten thousand support staff had been strategizing, constructing, and co-creating the festival over the last two years.
Weekends and holidays, vacations and staycations, the volunteers feel a belonging to “the Fusion'', they are painting the new world they envision with their very own hands. The festival has over 20 stages, over 200 cafes and bars, and over 600 love shows - each supported by a cooperative of volunteers or entrepreneurs. This is the chaotic, emergent, co-creation of an alternative universe. And the Fusion becomes more real with every cooperative business, every volunteer weekend, that materializes its values.
According to Marshall, the more tangible a contribution, the easier it is to remember, to integrate, to feel for the individual and for the group. Things like building community gardens, hosting plays or concerts, or cooking communal meals - these creates a physio-emotional response inside of us that says, “I have given and that gift has been received. Mission Happy, accomplished!”
With money as a medium, the dominant Western experience is deprived of this dance of tangible belonging. Our gifts and talents are so commonly rewarded exclusively with money, that it's hard to see if they are received or not. The real-time feedback loop of belonging is short-circuited as the giver and receiver become more distant. And this is why I believe that intentional communities emerge: people want to feel the loop of belonging in real time. It’s the itch we can’t scratch isolated in a cubicle, or behind a cash-register. Community, whether a permanent Ecovillage, or an ephemeral Festival, is the stage where we experiment with belonging - meeting our deepest need as a collective humankind.
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